Snow and baths. 

   
    
    
   
I love the snow so much. Baths are how I’m coping these days. It’s not been good and I’m fighting each day to survive. 

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Challenge. 

   I decided to do this challenge but won’t be posting it all on Instagram. You guys can! I got it from @galadarling so feel free to participate.   

First was a selfie. Since I didn’t take one Jan 1st it’s from the night before <3

   
Day 2 is my big dream. This year my dream is to build my portfolio and research to come closer to my goal. I also want to one day contribute in some way to a cartoon. I want to make some steps to get closer to visit Japan. 

  
Day 3 tarot card. My friend did a reading for me in honor of the new year. She sent along descriptions and I’m so grateful to her for doing that. It was so insightful and eye opening. 

I’ll keep updating on this challenge. If you’d like to follow my Instagram it’s rin_lollipop 

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Hungry like a wolf. 

  The intensity of your eyes offset by the calm pale pink of your hair. You put on makeup like war paint and breathe your lungs raw. When you love your claws sink deepest. You don’t let people close enough to hurt you, they have to earn their keep. They need to prove themselves. Jump through fire and withstand the storms just to have you around. 

When an outsider approaches your loved ones you bristle with fierce protection. You fight through the open wound in your chest and let it burn a hole through all your shirts. 

You swiftly move through the crowd as if a ghost. A floating rain cloud made of daggers. Once someone has the privilege of meeting your gaze you pull them in with with a menacing grin. Only kindness lingers around your upturned lips but it’s not as visible to the untrained eye. On the outside you may seem cold and untouchable and maybe that’s exactly how you want it. This coldness protects others and yourself from getting burned from the fiery pits below the surface. The frost bite runs through your vines so no one would ever see those flames unless they fought. 

You may have demonic sharp edges but beneath all that lays magic. Magic that shines from beneath your skin like frost. You take pride in your battle scars and busted up lip because you know you won’t leave without a fight. 

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Grateful. 

   
    
   Grateful for singing, comics in the bath, heaters, snow, coffee when it’s cold, alone time, pushing myself, my Christmas tree, plans, love, having enough food, Netflix, being bald, eyelash extensions, talks with my best friend, fall leaves. 

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Love. 

   
    
    
    
   

I love dressing up in costumes. I love being a vampire prince. I love bubble baths. I love writing short poems. I love love. Even if that love is fictional. 

Love to me is truly wanting another person to feel happy, and supporting them in what they gotta do. I won’t hold back the people I love because the only thing I want is to help them be the most happy and content in their lives they can be. 

❤️❤️❤️

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Update. 

   
  So grateful for my boys. Whenever I’m down Beo is always there to be a comfort and show me I’m not worthless and Lance always lifts me up. I just feel so lucky to have them.   
I went to my first appointment to schedule therapy. It was scary and I don’t really want to but I know it’ll be beneficial and help my life improve so I’m staying hopeful. Learning I have BPD has been eye opening and it made me realize how much I need help but this way it’ll be so much easier to identify what’s going on. No more living in denial just getting better ❤️ 

 

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Relevant. 

  

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